Hurt Me Again
by carmart113
Summary: She found her stealing food from the Careers' mound after finding Peeta dead by the river. They were inseparable ever since. Foxface and Katniss go through the most upsetting yet wonderful time together in The Hunger Games.


**Prologue**

She and I laid under the covers in the dark. It's just light enough to see the outline of surrounding objects. She's lying on her left side, facing me. The cold surrounding us is lightly brushing against my skin, so I inch in a little closer to her. She inches in, too. My head is gently pressed into her chest and her chin rests on top. Our bodies are as close as possible. Our legs are intertwined with each other's, and my right hand is locked with her left. My left hand traces gently around her arm. My head is still pressed right into her chest where I can hear her heartbeat clearly.

She is like home. Her body is familiar to me in that way. Her heart skips when I slide my hand from her arm to her side and down her back. It's beautiful, really, how every time that one little movement can make her heart skip every time. And every time I move, she pulls me in a little closer. It's always like that, and it makes my heart feel weak every time I even think about it. Nothing prepared me for this unconditional love I feel for her. I just love her. Nothing could have stopped it, either. Not even the games.

We're nestled like spoons. I play with her golden red hair as she traces her fingers around my other arm. Then, she takes my free hand into both of her hands and holds it tight with her head over it. She holds it tight and subtly brings her knees up a little higher towards her chest by a small amount. I brought my knees up to hers so our legs could be lined together. We drift off together in that position. We're not asleep, but we're not awake. We're in a state in between the two. It's like we're fading together into a beautiful new place. It's like a place for escape, where nothing can hurt us anymore.

It's these nights when I remember how much I love her. It's nights like this when I appreciate the little things more than I usually do. I appreciate her existence. I appreciate that she's still around after all this time. I appreciate all of it. I promise, to her and to myself, that I won't leave unless she does. All of the thoughts come into my head. These nights make me want to be a better person. I will make myself a better person for her. She gives me the motivation to do it. She is my reason. She is my love. She gives me hope.

When we're like this, I can't help but remember those days in the Games. After he had died from those berries, I didn't know what to do. I'd thought there was no chance of the both of us getting out then. I'd always thought that, I guess, but it really hit me when that canon went off. She never killed anyone. I'd always thought she'd win. I'd always known she'd win. She put more heart into getting by without harm to anyone else than I'd ever seen. She tried her hardest not to be changed by the Games. Everyone changes, though. She changed. I changed, but it all ended okay for once. Everything ended okay.

Everything fades out as we fall asleep. The last thing we feel before we're asleep is each others' bodies against one another, and the first thing we know when we wake is that we're still together. We're always together, no matter what. Flashbacks from the Games have made seeing each other when we awake even more relieving than it normally would be. Those nights, they were brutal. That last night in the games, I made a promise to her. I promised that I would never let her go through anything like that again. I'm keeping that promise.

It was for Prim. It _was _all for Prim. Everything up until we formed an alliance in the arena was done for Prim. When I met her, though, everything changed. There were two people that I couldn't let go, and there was no possible way to save both of them. Or so I thought. Everything happens in the Games for a reason. Sometimes the reasons are never known, but I believe that the games were meant to teach us something.

Never take things for what they seem. Seneca Crane is the perfect example of that. He wanted to be a part of the Games to stop them. Look at where that got him. Seneca Crane saved us. He tried to save Peeta, but Cato took him down. I couldn't find him in time. He was gone before I could find him. There are so many things about the Games that I wish I could change, but it was all for a reason. The Games kill us. Even if we live, our minds are so shot from the Games that it doesn't really matter if we live. We're still gone. Our minds have been twisted and contorted to the point where we're beyond repair, and the only ones who can save us are ourselves.

She shoots awake at that moment. Everything is jolted. She's screaming, crying. She's saying they're running after her. They're trying to kill her. She's terrified to the point that when her hands shake, it's almost as violent as a seizure. She's so scared. I can't help but scoop her up in my arms. I can't do anything besides tell her she's okay, that it was only a dream, and so on. It hurts so much to see her like this. I can't do anything to help her through her episode until it's over. It hurts. I'm trying to help her, but it's not working. She's not there. She's lost in the Games. It's so violent. She's reliving the worst moments. She's reliving what almost killed her over and over. I'm trying. _I'm trying. _But I can't do anything to help her. It's too much. My throat's closing up. My heart's sunk. My eyes are burning with tears. And all of a sudden, I can't control it. I just burst out crying. We may have won the Games, but we can't win against our minds.


End file.
